We Are All Healers.

Even those who walk around clueless of their healing abilities are still healers.  How can this be?

According to Dictionary.com the definition of Heal is “to make whole” or “to cure” which is something we subconsciously do when we feel pain or experience an injury.  We automatically attempt to make whole or cure the discomfort by placing our hand over the area causing issue, pressing down to stop the pain.

When mom kisses the boo boo, she will clean the wound, apply disinfectant and cover with a bandage.  She leaves her childs body to do the rest of the healing needed.  The body pushes out debris on it’s own and seals the skin “to make whole” again.  Mom has no control over what the body decides to do to heal.  She simply does what she can to make it better and lets the body do the rest.

Sometimes Healers Have To Do Nothing

I understand the frustration of knowing I can help someone who rejects all of my efforts. One of the hardest things we have to learn as healers is to recognize when our healing effort is unwelcome.  Then we have to accept that truth and still be present and love them no matter what they decide.

The Angels say if we try to push our will on one who is not asking for our help, we will have a boomerang effect and we will pay for our interference one way or the other.  They had to literally slap me upside my head with an energetic 2×4 and tell me with force “Who am I to think I know more than God?”

Ah, ok Angels.  I get it now.  It is absolutely the hardest thing any healer will have to learn.

Letting go and letting God, or as Master John, my Spiritual Teacher and the Master Angels say “Just Be”. Observe without reaction.

Of course, if it were easy everyone would do it right?

Why Don’t People Like Me?

One of the conundrums I’ve always had throughout my entire life, is wondering why I am always a better friend to people than they are willing to be back to me. Not that I was expecting something over the top, just a consideration and even a simple thank you for any efforts I made to help them.

Before my skills were developed to the level they are now, I didn’t understand how to read the signs when the help was not welcome.  I

t caused me great suffering as I couldn’t understand why I put myself out there all the time, entertaining, feeding and helping friends who couldn’t bother to do the same for me.

Did I smell?  Was I boring?  Am I not good enough?  Why wasn’t I invited to their party?  Why don’t people like me?

Rest assured, It is not you personally though it can be hard not to take it personally at first.  Here is my understanding of what is happening, why it happens, and how to help those who refuse your help without losing your relationship over it.

Being a healer scares some people away.  They can hold expectations that don’t coincide with how they know you as a person. They worry we can see through their act, that we’ll catch them lying because we see their aura, or that we’ll see cancer in their body and they don’t want to know.

In truth, for healers like me with medical intuitive insight, I can turn it off when I’m not working.  I deserve to have some fun.  I don’t want to be working 24/7.  I enjoy my down time without having it turn into a healing session.  It doesn’t always work if Spirit has an urgent message for someone, but for the most part, I keep it off when I’m on my own time.  Your secrets are still your secrets.

It is never up to any healer to decide what healing should or will look like for another, especially when it is unsolicited.  To violate this basic tenet of healing can jeopardize your relationships and split families apart.

Love Yourself At Least As Much

Healers are givers by nature.  They want to help, which, to someone who isn’t asking for that help, can be seen as pushiness, or feeling bullied.  That is the furthest thing from the mind of the Healer but to the unwilling, they will not understand our intention.

Many healers I know work long hard hours.  Myself included.  We want to give our clients everything we have, we want to help them and we forget we need to be a part of that loving care we give others.

Healers need to learn how to love themself at least as much as they love and care for their client or loved one.  If they don’t do that, they may be stuck in a childhood pattern of survival.

The Patterns Of Scapegoat, Co-dependent or Shadow Rescuer

I have always had this built in sense of awareness that whatever is happening “to me” is from something I am doing to create it.  Healers, in whatever form you take, need to understand this truth if you want to stop the cycle.  Believe me, it can be ugly to look at but it is what will save you from yourself.

This pattern of doing more for others than they were willing to do for me repeated a few more times.  However, as I grew into my awareness and intuitive insights, the length of time I allowed it to continue grew shorter and shorter.  Ultimately I was able to reach the point where I could spot the people who would willingly use me up and toss me aside.  I put a stop to it before I got drained.   I had finally discovered why I was not liked and it had nothing to do with me personally.

The experience of “helping” the unwilling was part of my growth, even though it made me feel so rejected and unworthy sometimes.  Let me tell you, once I figured out that was a good thing, guess what happened?

The Wounded Healer

All of those “takers” no longer appeared in my life.  More importantly, I was able to free the ones who were still sticking around.  I chose to no longer be a victim to these patterns and was now being blessed with friends who were very much willing to stand by me, help me and give as freely to me as I gave to them.

The wounds I carried as a healer unable to heal those who did not want it were finally healed.

As often happens when I am in the flow of Healing Light, I got introduced to the work of Robert Ohotto.  He has seen these patterns develop at a soul level.   He said in a lecture how it is a way to survive when we are born and develop survival mechanisms to keep ourselves from being abandoned as children.

What is meant to keep us safe as a 5 year old was not meant to carry into our adulthood, yet here we mostly are, using a 5 year olds instincts to lead us through the rest of our lives.  It is fascinating work and I recommend you look him up.

Dark Shadows ~ Why You May Not Be Liked

Master John said in one of his lectures that healers notice how hard it is to be liked.  While that validates what I’ve sensed for a long time, I still didn’t know why or what to do about it.

I understand now, the main reason we are not liked is because we can carry so much light and power, that it shines too brightly on others shadows and darkness.

People who are stuck in their stories of disease, illness or worthiness reject us, not for who we are, but for our light.  We get told we are too much of a know it all, bossy or get kicked down by name calling.  Many suffer ridicule and in some cases, we shut it off because it hurts too much.  We would rather be liked than stand strong in our truth of self.

The light, when it illuminates what others perceive as their faults, makes them recoil subconsciously.  This causes their mind and ego to create scenarios that point fingers that we are too nosy, too pushy, too whatever their ego needs to justify rejecting our help, and yes, making it our fault.   

Know The Truth

Others may reject us out of fear they can never measure up.  Where conflict arises is when they fail to realize they are never meant to do so and we fail to accept them where they are.  It’s not that we are better, smarter or stronger, any healer worth their salt would never have an ego that takes them down that road.

Instead, healers are just open to possibilities that others are not.  Healers ask how did this start, where others ask how to make it stop.  Your truth may be wanting to make it stop.  My truth is getting to the core reason it started and fix that so the body can do its own healing.  Both are right.  It all depends on what the person wants.

We, all healers, light workers and helpers are here to show them, through our own actions and our own light, what they can create.  More importantly, we are here to show them possibilities.

Not necessarily to heal them, but to guide them WHEN they are ready to ask for the help.  Perhaps this is why we are never intended to heal the world!

We heal ourselves so that we can be a beacon for them to see possibilities. If they are ready, they will reach out.

If they are not, we love them anyway and we wish them well.  It will be perfect either way.

It is why we will alway be a better friend to others than they can be to us. Let that sink in for a minute.  If your best intentions are met with resistance, trust it is not the time for the information to be made clear.

You will be a better friend when you learn how to be ok with choices others make.  When you let go of your own resistance to this truth, your relationships can bloom.  There will no longer be pressure felt by another that you are trying to fix something broken in them.

There is much we can do to heal others who want it.  It is when we push against another persons free will that we cause bad feelings and create bad karma for our actions.  Instead, we can just be in the flow of allowing whatever you call the source of power within yourself, to manage it without controlling the outcome.

All you need to do is trust it is done and be willing to be ok with the perfection of their choices, especially if they are not choices you would make for them.  After all, you are not born to learn their lessons for them.

Practice Being Ok No Matter What

Stand in your power and truth without forcing your will on another.  Love and help them if they ask.  Just don’t forget that part of the equation requires you love yourself at least as much as you are loving them.  If that is not your truth, the Angelic Realm wants you to make it so.

I trust the Angels are reaching those who need to hear their message.  If it is only one person, that is perfect. If they want to reach millions, they will create that too. I am their vessel, their conduit and I am happy to be in their service.

Let the Angelic Realm be your anchor, your strength and your access to your power.  Then get out of your own way so they can bring you the people who will love you for who you are, instead of for what you can give them.  Ask them to help you to be ok letting go and trusting it is always perfect.

Remember Why You Became A Healer

Healers, for the most part, become so because we too, were sick, lost, given up on by the medical field.  We had to fight for our health and gain our strength from our challenges.  Why would it not be the same for others to find their way from their situation as well?

There are multiple paths to the same destination of wellness.  Be the friend that lets them find their footing while being the bright light of love for them to look towards . They may choose a route that will keep them ill or choose to ignore methods that you believe will help them.

Give them the information if they ask for it.  If they don’t,  just love them, commiserate with them, and allow them the dignity of their own choices.

Be Ok When They Reject Your Work

Allowing them to heal on their terms is the best way to keep friends and family in your life without overstepping, lecturing, whining or forcing them to take a path not meant for them.  I still offer my services when I’m guided, and more times than not, I’m guided to just be present, to listen without judgement and to just be there for them.

What has changed for me is I’m ok either way.  If all my offer did was light a momentary spark of hope for them, or if they shut me down completely, I am living the life of a healer as I am meant to.  I am shining the light for them to find a way back to their wholeness.  It is up to them to choose it or not.  Either way, it is always perfect.

I can’t count anymore how many times I have had to stand by while someone took a path I could intuitively see would lead to an unhappy conclusion or unnecessary suffering.  I am in that position once again as I watch my husband deteriorate from Alzheimer’s Disease.  The path he has chosen is not the path I would take for myself. The point the Angelic Realm had to hammer into me is “It is not MY path.  It is his.”

His choices, while they affect me, do not take away from the fact that I am a healer.   I’ve had to deal with those who question how good I am if I can’t “heal” my husband.  They do not understand, nor am I guided to explain very often that it is not up to me.  I am not his God.

I am guided by the Angelic Realm, I do have intuitive insight and I can work within that framework to keep him safe and secure while not forcing my will on his.  Just as I am able to do with others who cross my path.

If their journey takes them away from my help, it does not take away from the fact that I remain a healer.  I was simply not chosen to help them with their journey beyond what my Angelic Healing Team may have already accomplished for them.

But I Know Better Than They Do…..Why Won’t They Listen To Me?

If you find yourself frustrated with a friend with MS who is not interested in help outside of their medical doctor and toxic drugs, you are still a healer.  You are just not theirs.  When your father in law insists on binging on sugar and diet soda while taking extra insulin and tells you to mind your own business, then do that.

Like a drug addict or alcoholic that has to reach rock bottom in order to find their way back up to wholeness, so too does anyone who rejects your help.  They have to want your help for your help to actually help them.  Anything less than that is a recipe for bad feelings and difficult relationships.

Yes, it is sad and hard to watch someone suffer when you know you can help.  You have to always ask your own guidance what is the best steps to take with that person.  Mostly, you will lead by example.  You will be the one who, when you stop trying to heal the unwilling, they will decide to come to you for help.

When you stop putting up walls of judgement that creates their resistance, they will be able to see what you might be able to do for them.  Again, if they don’t, or can’t, you have to learn to be ok with it regardless.  Hold them in your light without interfering with their journey, their choices.  That is the most effective healing you could ever give them.

Healing The Healer Within You

You will know you are healed when you no longer react, when you can allow others to be who they are, to see who they are, and love them anyway.

When you no longer feel the weight of the world on your shoulders to heal everyone in your path, you can begin to live as one, to be a conduit for that light that may bring them back to you for healing if and when they are ready.  Even if healing means dying in peace.  To me, that is a healers path.